Serious Question: Is Shaq Broke?

Serious Question: Is Shaq Broke?

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Despite coming across as a doofus, Shaquille O’Neal is actually one of the more intelligent and multi-talented hoopers to ever play in the NBA. The Hall of Fame big man holds a doctorate, is a certified police officer, has acted in major motion pictures, had a fairly successful hip hop career and is now a successful television analyst.

Therefore, it seems like of all the great NBA players, the least likely to go broke in his post-playing days would be Shaq. However, his tendency to endorse random products with no prestige whatsoever attached to them raises a serious question as to the financial stability of the Big Aristotle.

Perhaps Shaq’s TNT cohort Charles Barkley, who is notoriously bad with money, has rubbed off on O’Neal in his retirement because for anyone who made the type of loot that Shaq made during his playing career to endorse The General car insurance must be in need of some dough.

On top of having the lamest, most unprofessional-looking commercials on television, The General is known for being a nickle-ass insurance outfit, catering to people who are too broke to afford legitimate auto insurance. So it would only make too much sense to posit that a celebrity desperate enough to endorse The General must be broke.

For what it’s worth, Shaq is endorsing other random products, as well. He’s still the spokesman for IcyHot, which was appropriate while he was actually playing professional basketball. But now that Shaq is retired and tubby, it seems weird for him to continue to endorse a muscle cream. The same goes for his role as the Gold Bond pitchman. He’s pretty much dropping his pride and admitting that he’s old by endorsing the official lotion of flabby seniors.

Who knows? Maybe Shaq isn’t broke and is instead just very greedy. As evinced by his performance in Kazaam, Shaq isn’t exactly a thespian, so he probably isn’t offered too many endorsement deals by respectable companies. Instead, he may just be forced to take what he can get, thus leading him to promote geriatric lotion and shitty car insurance. Let’s hope that’s the reason.

At least Shaq hasn’t stooped to Brett Favre’s level, though. Because growing your body hair out to ungodly lengths just to promote a gimmicky electric razor is definitely not a good look.

 

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